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by MenrowSpirit
Summary: When life has thrown you no bones, what else is left but to end it? ZelosXLloyd Fluff!


**Me:** A little ZelosXLloyd fluff I wanted to write. My friend was having a bad day and i wanted someone to save him. So that kinda inspired me. Also, **Tales of Symphonia belongs to Namco, Expecully the scene with Zelos and Lloyd talking in Flanior. That speech is 99% from the game**. Zelos's POV. Minor Yaoi references but nothing slashy

* * *

The snow felt cold around my body. I remember falling off the balcony..no...I remember jumping off. I remember seeing they snowy sky fade into black.

"Zelos?" A woman's voice interrupted my dizzy thoughts. I looked out the window, seeing the snow against the window, noticing them slightly fogged up from the heat inside. I was still in Flanior where there was always snow. I hate snow. Ever since my mother died on a snowy day, I spent every chance I could getting away from it. Even the rare times it snowed in Meltikio, I would vacation away, usually in Altameria, where the hunnies were.

"Zelos. Are you ok?" The woman's voice said again, causing my eyes to open and turn towards them. It was Sheena, a fairly close friend and someone that constantly dealed with my flirtatiousness. I didn't answer; mostly because I didn't want to. If she was here, then I had failed again. I noticed tears slightly in her eyes and she wiped them away.

"You idiot chosen! What were you thinking. I knew I shouldn't have believed you. After you seemed to have gotten better." The summoner sat on the bed beside and I decided to looked at the damage as she started ranting on. My wrist was in a cast and the other was wrapped up. My headband had been replaced with a head wrapping and my chest was wrapped up. I was on a constant suicide watch.

"The doctor says that you broke a few ribs, sprained your wrist and a slight concussion." Raine said, coming in, closing the door behind her. She had been the only one that really kept up with us after the journey. Presea and Regal had been working back at the company after the president's crimes had been dropped. The shorty Genis, was attending the archenemy in Palmacosta when it was rebuilt. I haven't heard from Colette in a while, but she had returned to Iselia. Raine stayed with her, but was often working in ruins. Sheena had returned to Mizuho and became chief. Ever since he left, I hadn't been myself. I was fine for a while, but slowly began to fall apart. Sheena happen to be there when I first did it. I think it was at the beach. I tried to drown myself and Regal had been there and saved me. The next time was when helping Sheena at her village, and after that..I sighed.

"I'm sorry voluptuous beauty." She hit my chest gently, yet angrily.

"You idiot! Why do you do this?! Jumping off the balcony?!"

"If you hadn't had your Crusix Crystal, you would have died." Raine said, placing her hand on his head.

"That was the point.."I turned, not really wanting her pity..or worry, whatever it was. It was hard to tell with Raine. I didn't want anything. What about that didn't they get. The dark haired woman got up form the bed.

"I'm not leaving this time! Not until you get over it Zelos!" What was there to get over? She didn't live the life I had and I didn't care to listen to another of her, dieing is ridiculous speeches.

"I'm sorry. Would you two please leave. I want to sleep." Raine glared at me with suspicion and headed out with Sheena. She shook her head.

"But Raine. He's not safe alone!" The summoner started to cry. Over the past few years, she had become softer and more emotional, not afraid to show her emotions.

"He can't do anything here Sheena. Zelos. We'll be right outside the door." I lifted my hand, waving whatever and the door closed. I didn't care if they were here or not personally. They were good friends, but not someone I wanted to see. i wanted to see that guy who left. What was it, five years now. That must have been why I wanted to end it in this stupid place. This was where I found out.

* * *

"Hey man. You asleep?" I entered the inn room where Lloyd was staying.

"Actually, I just got sleepy G'night." He said, coming over, his gloves were thrown on the bed.

"Whoa. Don't be like that. Let's go talk for a while." Lloyd shrugged his shoulders

"Sure ok. I wasn't that tired anyway." We stood on the balcony and I watched him fascinated by the same snow I hated. He told me once that they don't get snow in Iselia. I believed it when we stopped by there once. It was fairly warm around that tiny, country town. The snow stuck in his dark-brown hair, causing the flakes to stand out, giving my bud a somewhat beautiful glow. Most people didn't see past my mask. Sure, I flirted with women a lot and they were pretty. Lloyd changed my mind though. He was beautiful inside and out. I'm pretty sure he had a thing for the blond chosen though, so I often hung on the man and gave him my special nickname. I don't think he caught it. He is cute but not the brightest tool in the shop.

"Hey Zelos."

"Yeah?"

"You know. We've traveled with each other a long time now and yet, I barely know anything about you." Lloyd chuckled nervously.

"I mean. Your not a very open person you know." He brushed some snow from his head.

"I'm sorry. I don't mean to be nosy." I smiled slightly. He was so cute when he was nervous. Why was he nervous though? I couldn't put my finger on it and didn't notice him stand slightly closer to me.

"..On that day, Meltokio had a record snowfall. It looked just like this city.." Lloyd blinked.

"What are you talking about all the sudden?" I felt a slight embarrassment grow inside me.

"Ah..just a story about the past..I suddenly felt like talking about it." Lloyd rubbed his hands together as his breath froze in the colder air.

"Well. If you want to talk, I'm all ears." I smiled. I wanted to tell Lloyd more about me. I wanted..to be closer to him.

"I was so exsicted to see snow for the first time., and I made a snowman in the garden with my mother. Then suddenly, the snowman fell apart. Before I knew what was going on, red snow began to fall."

"Red..snow?"

"It..was my mother's blood. She was murdered. As she fell, she grabbed my shoulder and told me' 'You should have never been born." His frozen hand clenched up and he lowered his head.

"That's..that's horrible!" Maybe this wasn't the best way to get close to someone. But it was the darkest part of my life I held and I wanted Lloyd to know.

"My mother probably loved someone else. But because of the oracle from Crusix. She had to marry the next chosen..my father. And the old man had another woman." I froze up in my story, feeling Lloyd grab my arm.

"But none of that was your fault!" I felt his beautiful hands gripped tightly on my arm, as if wanting to steal my pain.

"That magic that killed my mother was meant for me." His eyes widen slightly and then grow angry.

"They targeted me because I was the next chosen. Mother was caught in the crossfire. The one that tried to kill me was Seles's mother. They arrested her and Seles's was put under house arrest in that abbey."

"So that's what happened..."

"I never wanted to be the chosen. I spent my whole life wishing I could run away."

"Chosens lead really difficult lives. I could only image what it's like. But I can understand how hard it must be." I looked down at his hands.

"Sorry. I guess it's kinda hard to think of something to say to that huh."

"But why did you decide to suddenly tell me that?"

"I should never have been born." I noticed something snap in Lloyd's eyes and he pulled my arm down tightly, forcing me to look him eye to eye.

"W Why do you say that?!"

"I'm not saying I think that way now." I lied. I still felt this way deep down. That's why I planned on turning Colette over, so Yggdrasil would release me of my chosen title.

"But all my life, I've been rejected by my parents, shunned by the church and viewed as a threat to the royal family. I just..wanted to run away."

"But your here with us now right." That's what his voice said but his eyes were begging me, asking 'but your here with me now right.'

"I dunno. Even now, to tell the truth., I get tired of all the problems. Sometimes, I think it's better if everything and everyone was just destroyed." I could see the anger in his eyes grow again.

"Zelos! How can you say that!"

"Did I piss you off." I said sarcastically but was actually hurt deep down. I had hoped he wouldn't get mad at me, but that wouldn't be Lloyd.

"Hell yes! Of course! It'd be a huge problem for me if everything was destroyed!"

"But think about it. If everything was destroyed, you would vanish too." I felt my heart crake. how could I say that to my bud. To the one man that made me want to stay.

"I refuse to vanish..and so I don't want anyone else to be destroyed...I want you to live too Zelos."

"I think I'm going to cry." I said sarcastically again.

"Don't make fun of what I'm saying!" I turned my head from him and his eyes softened.

"Oh man. You are crying. I'm sorry Zelos."

"No. Your right. Problems can't just vanish."

"Zelos." He lowered his head and the suddenly, wrapped his arms around my waist.

"I really mean it. I want you to live." I could feel his freezing hands through me clothes and grabbed his arms.

"Lloyd. You forgot your gloves inside." He pulled his hands around and wrapped them in mine, rubbing them trying to warm them up.

"I'm sorry." I lifted them to my lips and kissed them gently. I notice his face being to grow red and I smiled.

"Don't apologize." Lloyd looked down at the clamped hands and he stepped closer, leaning against my chest.

"Bud?" I managed to say, keeping my cool.

"I'll tell you something about myself also. I..like you a lot Zelos. I wanted to know more about you because I didn't think..I'm.." He mumbled off.

"What bud? Can't hear you."

"..good enough..for you." I dropped his hands and he pulled them up slowly to my chest, hesitant to touch me.

"It's just that your..very pretty and always have women all over you. I figured I didn't have a chance." I lifted my arms and wrapped them around the shorter teen in front of me.

"Bud. I didn't know you felt that way."

"It's..embarrassing." I looked down at him and lifted his head with me hand. I realized how young and small he was compared to me. But, my heart over-whelmed my mind. My bud had a crush on me and I had one on him. I saw his eyes widen as my lids closed, lips pressing against his. His warm breath against my face when the kiss broke.

"Z Zelos?!" The teen shuddered. I smiled and ran my finger across my lips.

"Your really cute Lloyd. Your way too good for me..and." I frowned and hugged him again.

"Lloyd. Your still a child. It could be a childish crush. You should save yourself for a real man." I couldn't believe what I was saying. I wanted to keep him in my arms forever. To hold onto this feeling of being wanted in the world. But I what I said was true. His heart was not only to good for me, it was young. He might just be confused with all the stress from Crusix and trying to save the world.

"I'm sorry Lloyd. Come on. Your freezing and need sleep for tomorrow." I turned him towards inn and lead him inside.

* * *

My eyes snapped open, unaware that I had even fallen asleep. I remember what happened after that. Lloyd left to go on his exshpere journey. That's when I began to fall apart really. All our group going on with their lives and I felt alone. Strangely, I mostly remembered his face and he said a few words in private before leaving. I got up from the bed, pulling the blanket around me and opened the door. Raine and Sheena were talking by the fire and didn't notice me head outside.

It was still snowing and I looked down to the ground. I was over-standing the balcony again. Was I really going to attempt it again so soon. This time I defiantly would succeed with my body already weakened. I sighed and used my less injured arm to climb up on the balcony railing, perched on it.

"I'm sorry Bud. I'm know I promised.." A memory came back to my mind.

_"So your leaving Bud. Sorry I can't go with ya."_

_"You can you know." Lloyd said, mounted on a reihard. I waved my hand,_

_"Sorry bud. I'm going to try and fix things with the pope and the royal family."_

_"I see. Umm..Zelos..Will you..wait for me?" i felt a grin form on my face and hugged my bud._

_"Lloyd. We'll see." I laughed and Lloyd hugged me back._

_"Ok Zelos. See you around."_

"See you around. Hehe. Lloyd. I don't think I'll be around long enough for that." I glanced up at the snow and let it fall on my face. I felt a slight breeze caused my body to shiver with goosebumps and stood up on the railing. I let the blanket fall behind me and tears froze in my eyes.

"It really would have been better if I wasn't born." My foot scooted closer to the edge, pushing the piling snow off to the ground below.

"I don't know what hurts more. Seeing you like this or knowing what you've done." My body tensed up. I heard the blanket be shooken off and wrap around me. A pair of strong arms wrapped around my waist.

"I'm not going to let you do this. I thought you would wait for me." A sensation ran up my body and I began to fall backwards. The person caught my back and legs and held me close to their body. Must have looked pretty pathetic for a man my age.

"Your freezing Zelos." I recognized this voice. It sounded like that seraphim from Crusix, but he left long ago. It had to only be that one person. I opened my eyes as I felt my body weight shifted more under the blanket and was carried into the inn.

"Lloyd?!" Sheena was both shocked and surprised to see her former 'leader' of sorts. Raine crossed her arms, seeing me wrapped up in a blanket.

"I managed to find him and told him what Zelos had done. Looks like it's a good idea that I did." The half elf said and lead Lloyd to my room. She decided to leave them alone, knowing things were going to get better now. Raine was the person that easily picked up on things and she knew that these two had a close relationship. If anyone could bring Zelos from his depressed state, it was Lloyd.

"And here we go." He sat on the bed, still holding me as we sat on the bed

"Lloyd? What are you?" I trailed off, looking at my friend's face. I hadn't seen it in so long, that I almost didn't recognize it. He defiantly took after his father. I lifted my hand and ran slender fingers through the hair that had partially fallen from it's spikes and around his more gaunt and handsome face.

"Wow b.."

"You haven't changed much Zelos." He said, putting his hand on my head and held it against his chest.

"Except this crazy need to end your life. Zelos why?"

"I missed you.." Was all my chocking voice could say. I couldn't believe that Lloyd had seen me like this. Our reunion was him saving me from killing myself. It deserved to be better.

"Bud I.." I felt his finger against my lips.

"Go to sleep. We can talk in the morning when your rested." I thought that would be nice if I was alive by then. I snuggled closer to his chest, noticing how much stronger it was then I was used to. So were the arms that wrapped around me. I felt like, our roles had switched from the last time we were in Flanior.

I could see the sun shine through the window and tried to move but felt an arm tighten around me. I noticed the exshpere on the hand and knew it was Lloyd's, his hot breath against my neck and sunk back against his body.

"I hope you don't mind, but you were freezing all night, so I warmed you up." I smiled and his arm lifted, moving hair from my face.

"Remember that one night. You said I was just a child with a childish crush. So, I asked you to wait for me." I was turned to face him and he smiled.

"Lloyd. What happened to you? Your...." I trailed off, getting lost in his wine colored eyes. He licked his lips and held them inches from mine.

"Well. You waited and I'm a man now. And I know for sure it wasn't a childish crush." He tilted my head and kissed my neck.

"Please don't hurt yourself anymore. I'm here for you now. You won't be alone." My sprained wrist clenched onto his arm as I was forced into a sitting position.

"So Zelos. Are you ok?" Lloyd smiled and I fell against his bear chest. He defiantly wasn't a child anymore and I could give into my heart.

"I am now." I whispered and ran my finger down his chest.

"Your gourgous bud." Lloyd blushed slightly and lowered his head, hiding his expression under his hair.

"I...than..nk..you." I smiled and hit his chest playfully.

"Your still so cute when your nervous." He grabbed my hand and studied the cast.

"You haven't gotten anyone to sign it yet." Lloyd tensed and kissed the cast.

"Let me be the first." I watched him grab a pen from a desk and sit back on the bed, writing on the cast.

"What are you doing?"

"Don't look." He said, holding my own hand out of my view.

I pulled it back when he released it, chewing nervously on the pen tip. I read a message on it that wasn't his name. My blue eyes teared up and I gripped it tightly.

"Ll.l.."

"What? Have I left the great Zelos Wilder silent? Please Zelos. I don't want to come off too strong but it is how I feel. It's how I've always felt." I felt my heart lift in my chest and want to jump from my throat. I hadn't felt this happen for years. For once, I didn't want to try and end it. I nodded and pulled the pen from his mouth.

"Yes Bud." He fell back on the bed, my weight on top of him as I took his lips. They lost the innocence of an inexperienced seventeen year old and tasted like the love of a now twenty-two year old man. Almost with a hint of lust, which was something I knew well about. Lloyd deepened the kiss as he set me into a sitting position again.

"Now. Promise you won't do any more attempts on your beautiful face of yours." Lloyd flirted. I was surprised at his actions and I rested against his warm body.

"Are you sure. Why me?" I asked. He grabbed my hand around be casted hand and held it on his chest.

"Because I love you. If I tried to list all the reasons, we'd never get out of this bed." He yawned and I smiled, then proceeded to kiss his chest and then up his body to claim his lips again. I was shocked to hear Lloyd let out a light moan, but there was a knock on the door before anything else could happen.

"Zelos are you awake?" Sheena opened the door when she got no response and almost jumped out of her garb.

"Z z Ll. What are you two!?" She watched in shock and slight arousal to see us almost conjoined at the lips. Lloyd pushed me back slightly,

"Sheena. Do you mind. I'm trying to spend some time with my boyfriend here." I lost all feeling in my body. Boyfriend?! Me of all people. A person that most people hated? Sheena slammed the door shut, bright red.

"What's wrong Sheena?" Raine asked and she lifted her hand shakily, pointing at the door against her back.

"THEY"RE MAKING OUT WITH EACH OTHER!" She couldn't help but yell in embarrassment. Raine folded her arms.

"I figured that much."

"WHAT?!"

"They've felt that way since the journey. They both just needed to grow up a little first." Lloyd set me back onto the bed beside him.

"Your still weak. And it's early. Let's go back to sleep K'?" Lloyd said, still liking to sleep in. I cuddled against his chest, his arm around my shoulder, allowing my head to rest on it.

"Ok Lloyd."

He took the blanket and threw it over our bodies, locking out the cold.

"Promise you'll be here when I wake up?" Lloyd said before closing his eyes. I smiled and glanced at the cast he had signed. Even after it came off, I would keep it always. It would be a constant reminder of why I had to live. I let sleep consume my tired body as the black ink on the white casting vanished behind eyelids. Lloyd was a good reason to live. I had a better reason to start liking snow again. That's when the man of this signature, that no one could compare to anyway, saved my life from myself.

_'Zelos. Will you go out with me?'_

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**Me:** Thanks for reading. Please Review xD


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